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Parents Help To Children In Bad Times
Shocking things happen, and it's unavoidable that our children
are exposed to them; sometimes they occur in
our communities, in the form of natural disasters like floods or
fires, or man-made crises like car or plane accidents,
or violent episodes like shootings or bombings. More frequently,
though, the mass media bring graphic and
immediate news of major national calamities such as the terrorist
attacks on the World Trade Center and the
Pentagon, the bombingsin Oklahoma City and Atlanta's Centennial
Park, or the crash of TWA Flight 800, into the
homes of people across the country.In reality, these days it's becoming
more and more difficult to prevent children
from experiencing such disasters through the media. While exposing
to catastrophes, children often display fears
and anxieties.
As these are normal; however, without proper assurance, the impact
of events like these can remain with children throughout their lives.
Through the right support and guidance, even very young children
can become resilient enough to weather the most traumatic disaster,
and grow stronger from the experience. Kids who experience a disaster,
or see news of it on television, may react with shock and their
sense of security may be shattered. Children may be reluctant to
stay alone or go out of the house, may express fears of the dark
or going to sleep, or may report nightmares or symptoms of illness.
Parents must express their love for children more than usual, both
verbally and physically, raising the level of affection and warmth
in the home will help children feel calm.
Try to maintain normal routines, to help children's sense of stability
also be available to children when they need to talk
about the disaster. Do read stories with children about disasters
and how people deal with them, discuss the kinds of
emotional reactions people have to disasters, explaining that it's
OK to feel afraid or angry. Also tell children about the
people—police, firefighters, emergency rescue teams—who
bring disasters under control, and explain how they are
always there to help last but not the least develop and discuss
home safety and emergency procedures.
Adolescent people who have witnessed or experienced a disaster may
feel victimized, vulnerable, depressed,
or distrustful. Numerous may lack the inner strength to deal with
those feelings; they may come to believe
that the world is evil,and that they are helpless to respond to
that evil.
A few even perceive disasters as a kind of punishment for their
own "bad" behavior or thoughts. Put experiences
into words gives children a sense of more control, explain to them
that disasters are real. Do talk about past disasters
they may or may nothave been aware of, such as those mentioned above.
Try to explain why they happened and what
(if anything) can be done to prevent similar things from happening
again.
About the Author: Jennifer Fairbanks is a community
supporter and researcher in violence
against women along
with her side business family
violence prevention fund.
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